Fear is something we all deal with, something we all try to pretend we don’t experience. But fear is something I’ve come across a number of times in the last few days. It’s been eye-opening in many ways. Living in Melbourne you are protected by the comfortable and predictable. Rarely do you fear for something except maybe being out of line regarding a social norm, like when you post something really stupid on social media? Oh yes, that fear comes the day after.
Here in SF though you have different types of fears, some, are immediate like when you walk down the inner city streets of San Francisco and are confronted by the masses of homeless people. Seriously they are everywhere. And coming from the comfort and civilisation of Melbourne. I am fearful.
This is because from what I've observed American’s seem to be a people who are both easily offended as well as very vocal about their opinions. Combine this with a difficult life situation and you can see why I have a healthy dose of awareness while walking down the street at night.
This is weird because the American's of SF are actually great. If you get into a conversation, need help with something, maybe you're just walking by someone somewhere, they really very nice people.
Maybe my opinions are a bit discriminatory... I don't know, it seems to be a bit strange that a place which has so much tech and drives to solve the world's problems, seems to be ignoring this one which is faced by so many people.
Other fears though are on the horizon, for example, right now I’m lying on the bottom bunk of my hostel bed. Above me is my new best friend who is a former rugby player. Now I weigh around 85, he is at least 30kg more. This double-decker bunk bed is great, it has the same scaffolding properties as a bunch of straws plus I'm pretty sure it moves a little when the door to the room is opened and closed. The last strand of hope was lost when I inspected the welding, this did not help, it did the opposite.
My point is, tonight I sleep in fear and given this may be my last update, its been fun, remember me, I tried. Goodnight.